Ariel.Club Forum

Every other forum seems to do this, so why make Atomclub an exception. (If your hair is golden, look away now...)

Two sisters, a blonde and a brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so they can breed their own stock.

The brunette balances their checkbook, then decides to take their last $600 dollars out west to another ranch where a man has a prize bull for sale. Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "If I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home." The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less.

After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pick-up truck and drive out here so we can haul it home." The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word."

Well, with only $1 left after paying for the bull, the brunette realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word, comfortable." The telegraph operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pick-up truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you just write,' comfortable'?" The brunette explains, "My sister's a blonde. She'll read it slowly."

Very good Bruce And clean as well!

Waiting for the next friday 

A salesman was looking for a room for the night and went into and inn.  "Have you got a room for the night?" He asked the owner.  "Well we are full up, but I suppose you could sleep with my daughter, if you promise to to bother her." said the owner.  So after a meal and a couple of late night drinks the salesman went up to the room and so as not to wake the dauhter got undressed in the dark and slipped into bed.  The next morning the owner asked how the night was.  The salesman said "It was OK, but your daughter was rather cold". "Yes," said the owner "we're burying her today."

nice

Have you heard about the new 'Two in one' hair shampoo, designed especially for gypsies?

Go & Wash

And there was I expecting the standard to go up...

and you should know better How many years do you have in the university of life?

I was walking along the street when I came across a chicken, "cluck cluck cluck" it said.  "cluck cluck cluck" I replied.  Then a policeman came along and arrested us both, for using fowl language.

Thank you, I'll be here all week

Ben

P.S. despite the above I did used to work as a stand up in Belmarsh prison, talk about a captive audience.

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the President his daily briefing. He concludes by saying:

"Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sit stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks.......... "How many is a brazillion??!"

Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee machine, inhales a big  breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice.



After a week of this, she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and asks to file a sexual harassment grievance against him.



The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled and asks, "What's so sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?"



The woman replies...












"It's Keith, the midget."

A fairy tale

Once up on a time a man asked a woman to marry him, she said 'no'

So the man went out with his mates, drunk a lot of beer, went motor racing and lived happily ever after

the end

Ben

Blimey Ben - something you want to tell us?


[quote="benyeats"]
A fairy tale

Once up on a time a man asked a woman to marry him, she said 'no'

So the man went out with his mates, drunk a lot of beer, went motor racing and lived happily ever after

the end

Ben
[/quote]

Is it still Friday?

What's the similarity between parsley and pubic hair?  You push them both to one side and carry on eating.     

Geez! And I though I was bad!!!           

I don't get it anyway.